| T O P I C R E V I E W |
| FUBAR |
Posted - 18/06/2008 : 22:06:24
Some of the finest double entendres on British TV & Radio...
Michael Buerk on watching Phillipa Forrester cuddle upto a male astronomer for warmth during eclipse coverage said:
"They seem cold out there, they're rubbing each other and he's only come in his shorts."
Ken Brown commentating on golfer Nick Faldo and his caddie Fanny Sunneson lining-up shots at the Scottish Open:
"Some weeks Nick likes to use Fanny, other weeks he prefers to do it by himself."
Mike Hallett discussing missed snooker shots on SkySports:
"Stephen Hendry jumps on Steve Davis's misses every chance he gets."
Jack Burnicle was talking about Colin Edwards' tyre choice on World Superbike racing:
"Colin had a hard on in practice earlier, and I bet he wished he had a hard on now."
Chris Tarrant discussing the first Millionaire winner Judith Keppel on This Morning:
"She was practising fastest finger first by herself in bed last night."
'Winning Post's Stewart Machin commentating on jockey Tony McCoy's formidable lead:
"Tony has a quick look between his legs and likes what he sees."
Ross King discussing relays with champion runner Phil Redmond:
"Well Phil, tell us about your amazing third leg."
Cricketer Neil Fairbrother hit a single during a Durham v Lancashire match, inspiring Bobby Simpson to observe:
With his lovely soft hands he just tossed it off."
Clair Frisby talking about a jumbo hot dog on Look North said:
"There's nothing like a big hot sausage inside you ona cold night like this."
James Allen interviewing Ralf Schumacher at a GrandPrix, asked:
"What does it feel like being rammed up the backside by Barrichello?"
Steve Ryder covering the US Masters:
"Ballesteros felt much better today after a 69."
The new stand at Doncaster race course took Brough Scott's breath away...
"My word," he said. "Look at that magnificent erection."
Willie Carson was telling Claire Balding how jockeys prepare for a big race when he said:
"They usually have four or five dreams a night about coming from different positions."
Carenza Lewis about finding food in the Middle Ages on Time Team Live said:
"You'd eat beaver if you could get it."
A female news anchor who, the day after it was supposed to have snowed and didn't, turned to the weatherman and asked:
"So Bob, where's that eight inches you promised me last night?"
Not only did HE have to leave the set, but half the crew did too, because they were laughing so hard!
USPGA Commentator:
"One of the reasons Arnie (Arnold Palmer) is playing so well is that, before each tee shot, his wife takes out his balls and kisses them .... Oh my god!!!!! What have I just said?!!!!"
Metro Radio:
"Julian Dicks is everywhere. It's like they've got eleven Dicks on the field."
Harry Carpenter at the Oxford-Cambridge boat race 1977:
"Ah, isn't that nice. The wife of the Cambridge President is kissing the Cox of the Oxford crew."
Ted Walsh - Horse Racing Commentator:
"This is really a lovely horse. I once rode her mother."
New Zealand Rugby Commentator:
"Andrew Mehrtens loves it when Daryl Gibson comes inside of him."
Pat Glenn, weightlifting commentator:
"And this is Gregoriava from Bulgaria. I saw her snatch this morning and
it was amazing!"
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| 7 L A T E S T R E P L I E S (Newest First) |
| Fluffy Sheep |
Posted - 15/09/2008 : 13:46:38
I have had several patients who`ve asked for `disposable` paracetamol because they have trouble swallowig tablets. |
| sweeny todd |
Posted - 14/09/2008 : 00:27:45
not being a cricket fan , i was quite amused to hear a comentater say the batsmens HOLDING the bowlers WILLY mind you this was some years ago does anyone remember this radio fopar |
| thedelboy |
Posted - 13/09/2008 : 23:08:10
on hearing her son had bumped his car Mary said AAron you are incontinent |
| sweeny todd |
Posted - 13/09/2008 : 22:00:45
i was working away from home when my second wife was in labour with my 5th child my mother visited her in hospital ,in the opposite bed a lady was well overdue , to which my then wife ! said OH MUM that poor girl is getting seduced tomorow i still dont think she understood the reason for my mothers uncontrolable laughter ! |
| thedelboy |
Posted - 28/06/2008 : 21:11:21
my Mary said a clasic when her elder brother and sister inlaw went on a world cruise "Well my Bob is circumcising the world "
My mum on catching my little brother(he is now 40) watching a porn video "If I ctch you wtching that rubbish again I will take you in hand" neither of them could understand why I was wetting myself laughing |
| Fluffy Sheep |
Posted - 20/06/2008 : 23:23:01
This lot reminds me of a Lady I nursed some years ago, still an outrageous flirt at the age of 96.
Watching the cricket on TV, she said `I DO love to see the young men in their cricket whites rubbing their balls`. Then blinked all innocently like she didn`t know why the staff choked with chuckling at her.... |
| Miriam Binder |
Posted - 18/06/2008 : 22:10:12
Tears are rolling down my face as well! |
